Let me make myself abundantly clear. I freakin’ love Gilmore Girls. I just do. As fictional TV settings go, Stars Hollow is pretty high on my list of places to live; a perpetual autumn wonderland where pop culture is currency, coffee runs freely and junk food doesn’t make you fat. It’s just so darn nice, you know? So I did a small, happy dance when news broke of the upcoming revival, a four part ‘year in the life’ mini series to be released in November.

But. BUT. The more I read about what’s in store for the revival, even with a promising trailer and the comforting knowledge that original show runner Amy Sherman-Palladino is back at the helm (can we pretend season 7 never happened?), the more I am set upon by a distinct unease. Ok, ‘set upon’ is a bit strong, but there is definitely unease lurking there, somewhere beneath the glossy sheen that six hours of fast talking, heartfelt, dramedy seems to promise. Remember how excited we were when Netflix brought back Arrested Development and it was okay but… just okay? I’ve got worries.

Ghosts of boyfriends past.

All of Rory’s ex boyfriends will be there. Blerg. People seem so divided over which of Rory’s three suitors should have been hers forever but can we not take a sec to remember they were all, in individual ways, kind of terrible? Is it a High Fidelity style self-examination-through-past-mistakes situation?  I hope not. I hope Rory’s storyline will not revolve around her ex boyfriends.

My hope for the revival is that the return of the three dudes is for cameo value only. So much of the conflict of the show is around how Rory has the pressure of being something in her own right – to not be defined as wife, like Emily, or to make mistakes and struggle like Lorelai. I hope in the revival we get to see her be that something, the something she set off to be by turning down a proposal to go be a journalist on the Obama campaign, instead of defining her by her relationships to Dean, Jess and Logan.

Blerg. (Source)

The fate of Lane Kim.

Oh Lane, how much more you deserved than one dud shag which ultimately saw you stuck in the small town you longed to leave, with twins, while your husband went on tour. Please be only back in Stars Hollow for a short visit between doing kick ass things and living a rock n roll lifestyle.

Hep Alien forever!

(Source)

Stars Hollow circa 2016.

Stars Hollow feels so firmly fixed in the early 2000s and I’m just not sure how it will fit in 2016. How will Doose’s Market compete when you know there is likely a Wholefoods not ten minutes down the road? How is Mrs Kim coping with hordes of hipster antique pickers, casually instagramming the living shit out of all those autumn colours? What’s on Kirk’s youtube channel? I seriously want to know. But the world is a heavier place than it was in 2006 and what if Stars Hollow has lost its cosy shine? We’re already going to be faced with tears over the death of Richard Gilmore. What if come 2016 Stars Hollow, itself practically a character in the show, just doesn’t quite work?

Highly instagrammable. (Source)

The trailer seems to be trying its hardest to enforce that we are very much ‘in the now’, with cracks about Gwyneth Paltrow’s Goop, Amy Shumer, and the corpse flower. As much as I’d love to hear Lorelai’s takes on Pokemon Go and uber, I hope it’s not just topical gags. There are better ways to bring out a maturity of ten years. As a town that wasn’t always diverse or inclusive, wouldn’t it perhaps be nice if the rumoured wedding was, say, Michel’s?

Regardless of how it plays out, don’t ask to see me come 25th November. I have plans.

‘Til next time,